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Dear Elf on the Shelf, Why do you need to be sold at every store on earth? I thought Santa sent you magically? It’s going to get super confusing when L realizes that the Elf at Target is the same one Santa sent to his house.
Dear L, You don’t know it yet, but your favorite cousin and BFF is coming down from up-north to spend the night tonight! I can’t wait to see how excited you are.
Dear The Tabloids, How many times have you said Jennifer Aniston is pregnant? She’s pregnant every other month according to you guys. I wonder what’s going to happen if she really has a baby? No one will ever believe it.
Dear Television Without Pity, I still miss you.
Dear USPS Tracking Notifications, I love getting you and think that the service is awesome, but I do not understand why I need to get 3 text messages per tracking update. One to tell me about the package, one to confirm that I subscribed to this and another to just confirm all this.
Dear Christmas Cards, You win, I ordered you.
Dear Baxter, I know you can jump on the bed by yourself so I don’t know why you feel the need to cry in the middle of the night so I will pick you up and help you. But you know I will, so you continue it.
Dear B, Congrats on finishing up the semester! It’s going toy be nice having you home every night!