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Dear My Painting Skills, You clearly need some work because you messed up a project that is supposed to be unable to be messed up. #fail.
Dear Michael Phelps, You are a beast. A complete beast. Incredible. I get chills just watching.
Dear Schwans, I am super impressed with your new fancy frozen pizzas. Very good.
Dear This Hot Weather, I am so over you. Every says I will miss you when it’s snowing and -20 degrees out, but no, I won’t. How does one miss when it’s 95 degrees out with 90% humidity? They don’t.
Dear Simone Manuel, The look on your face when you won the gold medal was everything. Pure joy.
Dear Advocare, I can’t wait to get my Blue Raspberry spark. I can only hope it’s as good as I am expecting it to me.
Dear L’s School, Wait, now half days don’t all end at the same time? Some end at one time and some end 20 minutes later? That doesn’t make it too confusing or anything.
Dear NBC, If you showed some of these events live (cough, cough gymnastics) maybe people wouldn’t have to stay up until 12am to watch them?????