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Dear WB, Did you seriously try to get up at 6am yesterday? Seriously? Come on. You know that’s not happening. Thankfully after watching a little tv (aka your aquariums) in your crib you went back to bed. Until 9:30am like a good baby ;).
Dear Dole Banana Dippers, Umm, you were totally worth the time I spent looking for you yesterday. It’s a shame I will have to eat you all up in the next few days ;).
Dear Julep, OMG, this month’s collection is the best in ages. Totally knocked it out of the park. Totally. And yeah, I got the full collection. Again. Took me two seconds to decide.
Dear L, You are so so so so lucky to have neighbors with a pool. And neighbors with grandkids who want you to come swimming in their pool with them. It’s going to be a fun summer!
Dear Instagram, This new video thing is super fun, however, I would prefer if the videos didn’t start automatically as I scrolled by them. Sometimes I like to Instagram on the sly. I clearly need to scroll faster.
Dear My Kitchen Counter, Why are you never clean. No matter what I do, two seconds later you have a spot. I have no idea how it happens. But it does. Every.single.time. Makes me want to scream.
Dear Big Brother, OMG, all those spoilers have me even more excited for you to start. Let’s speed these next few days up okay?
Dear The Crane Game, If my kid has a stuffed animal in your crane, don’t make it fall out. Because guess who has to deal with that? Me. A**hole.
Dear B, Oh, now you’re going to run a marathon? WTF? Way to look the rest of the world look bad with your athletic ways and unlimited energy. A**hole.
