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Dear Denise Richards, You are a class act. Taking care of your ex-husband’s & his ex-wife’s kids while she is in rehab and he is working (and being crazy)? You, my friend, deserve a medal. I hope Brooke Mueller appreciates this during her 19th (yes, 19th) stint in rehab.
Dear B, I am so proud of you for doing so awesome this semester at school. I would have been a crabby b*tch if I worked full time and went to school full time, but you? Never. You are the best!
Dear My Secret Santa, Umm, you are the best Secret Santa in the history of Secret Santas. Seriously. I am still amazed by your generosity and holiday spirit! I need to think of an amazing way I can pay this forward!
Dear PopSugar, Seriously, slow down in getting my Luxury Must Have box to me. If you don’t get your butt in gear, this is NOT going to arrive by Christmas. Also, this better be amazing.
Dear Christmas Tree, Please don’t fall over this year when we have ornaments on you. You already fell over once this year (pre-ornaments) and I think that was enough. Umm, plus you are tied to the banister now ;).
Dear Me, Organizing your make-up yesterday instead of wrapping Christmas presents probably wasn’t the best use of your time. You’ll pay for this later. I am certain of it.
Dear Jersey Shore, I can’t believe you are almost over. I had a good time with all you guidos the last few years and I am sad it’s coming to an end. Rest assured, I will think about you each and every time I get my GTL on.
Dear House Builders, Why oh why do you have to build in my neighborhood? It’s not summer, so there will be no hot shirtless guys to oogle and it’s a little chilly out to climb on the huge dirt piles with L (although we still probably will – it will just be less enjoyable), so where does that leave us? Oh yeah, with tons of construction trucks and chunks of dirt all over the street. Super.
Dear Dark Chocolate Peppermint Pretzel Crisps, Where are you little buggers hiding? I found you once and I WILL find you again, but why do you have to make it so hard?
Dear Mailman / UPS Man / FedEx Guy, I’m sorry about this week. Sort of anyways. I’ve done 99.9% of my Christmas shopping online this year and I loved it. But you may not be loving all these huge packages I have been receiving. Thank you for being so nice about it.