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Dear Lady at Salad Place, My baby is not “tiny”, but thanks for throwing in your two cents in on it. Your 5 month old who weighs nearly 2x what WB does is just huge. Enormous actually.
Dear WB, Finding you sleeping FACE DOWN in your crib might be the scariest thing ever. I’ve tried to tell you how freaky it is, yet you don’t care and continue to do it.
Dear Groupon, Thank you for actually sending me my package, even if you sent me the wrong tracking number first. My husband LOVES his iPhone controlled helicopter (anniversary gift). That, along with the Mantry Crate has scored me major points. Major.
Dear UPS Man, Mailman, FedEx Man, etc., I am so sorry about this week. Well actually I am not sorry and I am loving all the packages I am getting. But I do feel like maybe I should consider holiday gifts for you all.
Dear Blog Readers who click on my links and buy things, Seriously, I love you. I cannot tell you how much I love free stuff. For real, you rule. Just so you know, I don’t make a red cent from blogging. It just makes my hobby and my giveaways (I am having another one soon BTW) less expensive for me!
Dear B, Just because you thought about bringing me home flowers on our anniversary doesn’t mean anything. It’s not the thought that counts in a situation like this.
Dear Vacation, It’s going to be a LONG time before we see each other again. But still I am very excited. Although I am not sure the term “vacation” really applies when you have little kids. It’s just moving the chaos to a more fabulous location.
Dear Kroger Gas Station, Wow, you sure are a complete clusterbleep. Oh my. Cars moving every direction, cutting each other off, all in an effort to be able to pump their gas first. Insanity. And to the lady in front of me, who still did not have her credit card ready and spent five minutes sitting at the pump looking for it (after waiting in line), you suck. Part of me thinks you did it (so slowly) on purpose just to p*ss me off, but since I was only swearing at you in my head, that’s unlikely.
Dear My Friends, Sometimes I get the most hysterical texts from you guys and they make my entire day. Getting a text about the same thing I am laughing about? That’s the best and I love you guys!